About a year ago (and a few months) I reviewed Batman Begins which I loved (I gave it 19/20) but at the time I did not know of any other films [I vaguely knew of Batman and Robin after seeing bits of it]. Now I have seen all the Batman films from the very first Batman in 1966 to The Dark Knight [only saw a bits of Batman 66 off of Youtube so I won't give it a review]
To be honest Batman is the only superhero I could get into so these are the only superhero themed movie reviews you will see all the same I think I'll wait to review Batman89 til' I get The Dark Knight for my birthday because they are so alike and Batman66 when I get the thing on DVD (if that ever happens)
Aww but enough of this time start the New Year off with a review
Batman Returns (1992)
Presentation: 16/20 (I loved the dark beginning with a rich couple dropping their deformed baby into a creek,but at the same time it came off as unrealistic and dark just for being dark with no real 411)
Plot: 12/20 (This is one of the worst aspects of the film,basically that deformed baby I mentioned earlier has grown up into a monster everybody calls The Penguin and he is trying to at first figure out what he can do in Gotham City,steal everybody's babies in revenge for his own fate,then run for mayor as a diversion.I'm all for the first bit but the rest is hairbrained and makes little sense. Then you have a nice timid secretary named Selina Kyle working for a huge tycoon who reads the wrong file and gets pushed out a window to what should've been her death.Jealous of all the attention Batman gets she goes to Penguin for help but at the same time she wants vengeance on her boss for atempted murder.After that she's doing random stuff. The "3rd villain" is the big tycoon simply trying to build a plant that will make him rich while stealing from everyone else. Over all that Batman is simply trying to keep peace. My gripe with all this is,it's too much to follow and makes little sense but it's still intriging)
Characters: 17/20 (I liked the characters especially Catwoman/Selina Kyle. What all the plans weren't realistic the characters [other than Penguin] were.I liked the whole Selina Kyle + Bruce Wayne thing and how it quarreled with the Batman vs Catwoman thing.The Penguin was enjoyable anyway even if he wasn't believable. I didn't like Max Shreck at all though he's too much like a real world tycoon for my liking and he came off as lackluster)
Keaton's Role: 19/20 (He plays Batman,who continues the idea of a tormented vigilante doing what he does only because he feels guilty over his parents death.But in this film he is the voice of reason and still tormented but only this time between trying to start something with Selina Kyle and deal with Catwoman. Not quite as good as Bale in Batman Begins as Batman or Bruce Wayne I felt his Bruce was too assertive and calm but his Bruce was fun to watch anyway)
Pfeiffer's Role: 20/20 (She plays the madly in love Selina Kyle and the vindictive,fiery tempered and wild Catwoman.Some say she comes off as too sexual but honestly I liked how she did her role. She's good at switching emotions)
De Vitos Role: 14/20 (He was good at being the complete maniac Penguin is supposed to be,he seemed perfectly gruesome,but of course he's the star of the show.The real problem was he was a little bit too disgusting and he kept making annoying grunts.I get that he's deformed and raised by penguins but nonetheless)
Walken's Role: 11/20 (I didn't like Shreck to begin with and while I'm all for subtle villainy,I think went too subtle. He made Max Shreck look like a somewhat clueless oaf and didn't seem threatning more like a bother.He redeemed himself at the end when his character shot at Selina Kyle 4 times)
Set:12/20 (The set was horribly mediocre, Gotham looked really weird it didn't look like a city, it looked liked it was in a studio)
Execution: 20/20 (In spite of a few acting flaws and odd plots,everything fell into place perfectly and unlike Batman89,the main villains death made sense.)
Final: 16/20 (This could've been one of the best films ever unfortunatley the director went too far with the main villain and not far enough with another and the plot could've been less complex and hairbrained.If only this film focused a bit more on the whole Selina Kyle+Bruce Wayne and Batman vs Catwoman conflict and less of The Penguin)
After Batman Returns the director was dropped for someone who would make the next film a little bit more kid friendly and a little less grotesque and sexual. Unfortunately the later wasn't dropped. One thing that bothers me most about this one is the title I mean Batman Forever that's confusing and doesn't make an ounce of sense.
Batman Forever (1995)
Presentation: 8/20 (I was not impressed with the beginning one bit which starts off with Two Face taking over a bank the problem now I'd be fine with that if it wasn't for the lack of action and stupid dialogue that no kid would catch [ok fine I wouldn't ctach the important part at age 5 I'd just repeat "Why,Why,Why,WHY???? Luck blind, stupid, simple, doo-dah,clueless LUCK !!!!" without getting the important part] and I didn't like Batman's reaction much either.The tone changed from dark and gothic to campy and colorful. I easily prefer dark over campy but hey if the jokes are good and if well executed I'll be fine.Sadly this movie did not presen itself as the good kind of campy)
Plot: 5/20 (Unimpressed with the plot.Ok so basically 2 years after Harvey Dent became Two Face he robs a bank with Batman trying thwarting him.Meanwhile one employee at Bruce Wayne Industires is tampering with brain waves.So Two Face raids a circus killing off Dick Grayson's family which plants the seed for Dick Grayson to become Robin [their trapeeze ropes are cut and since they don't have safety net,they fall to their deaths] and inspiring this employee to become a villain who names himself The Riddler.After The Riddler becomes a villain he teams up with Two Face to take out Batman and get his brain wave invention into everybodies homes in order to become more and more intelligent. Not only is this waaay to complex,but it isn't intriging and doesn't show any promise plus the whole idea of a brain waave device as the most important item?)
Characters: 10/20 (I liked change in Bruce Wayne from being sort of mentally unstable without Batman to still assertive but a bit more emotional. The Riddler was a fun idea even if his plans were ridiculous.The idea of a tormented Dick Grayson really worked out,I think the new director took que from Batman89 and Batman Returns idea of Batman/Bruce Wayne.So far the roster looks promising but then comes this joke of a Two Face who doesn't look like he's been scarred more like he's a crazy lunatic wearing red make up.The final nail in the coffin is the love interest who is unbelievably inhuman who would fall for Batman over a man who isn't dressed. Most people would be intimidated by Batman rather than fall in love although if well executed it might be ok)
Kilmer's Role: 17/20 (He really improves a lot upon the Bruce Wayne persona like I said earlier.It really shows in one scene where he is talking to Dick Grayson about how he understand the pain Dick is going through.He's not the selfish obnoxious Bruce we see in Batman Begins and Dark Knight but he's a push in the right direction)
Jones' Role: 0/20 (His character he's supposed to play looks like he's wearing make up with a bad suit unfortunately he potrays Two Face just like the make up he wears,which is a gibberish speaking,idiotic,gun happy clown with a "burned" face. After the beginning he went from aperhaps threatning to a "WHAT THE HECK IS DOING?!?" character)
Carrey's Role: 14/20 (At times Jim Carrey sounded and acted just like what Edward Nygma and The Riddler would do which was great. But at other times he was walking goofy,referencing Ace Ventura,and pulling the crotch.Oh well the comic relief from this side is actually fun to watch [except the crotch pulling part of course] unlike Tommy Lee Jones' Two Face)
O'Donnell's Role: 9/20 (With the exception of 2 scenes he came off as whiny wuss who couldn't get a grip which gets on my nerves. Still in one scene in which he is Robin,he makes a nice campy character that is fun to watch when he says "HOLY RUSTED METAL BATMAN".The other scene is when he talks to Bruce about becoming a sidekick after discovering his guardians double life.A shame most of his scenes weren't so beautiful)
Kidman's Role: 0/20 (She came off more as creepy than beautiful.I already thought she had problems after seeing all those Batman posters in her office and her reaction to discovering Bruce's identity is what really drove me crazy)
Set: 12/20 (Unlike Returns,with the exception of a few skyscrapers and Nygma island the set used for Gotham looks more like a city but unfortunately the Wayne Manor looks hideous and most areas were unbelievably green.)
Execution: 4/20 (The plot was not well carried out at all,Two Face agreeing to do something so ridiculous with a coin flip? He should've decided between killing Riddler or beating the crap out of him sure it would be nice to know Batman's identity but it favors Riddler waaay to much. And there's no way Alfred would just let them in if they knocked,besides there's no way a small face cover would jide there identity. How the villains were defeated was the lamest part I mean really Two Face died looking for coin? REALLY? Plus the romance portion didn't work out either)
Final: 8/20 (The movie had promise once it got to the part where Two face raids the circus and kills the Graysons.I really liked Val Kilmer's work and Jim Carrey was good for laughs but everyone else falt out sucked.Chris O'Donnell could've been good if he changed his tone just a little bit and did more things as Robin. Nicole Kidman was useless and unecessary in this movie.It's a shame this movie depended more on the actors [who were half baked at their characters] than on the plot which horribly wrong.I know it was supposed to be a kids movie but there's no way a kid would even stand a villain that looks like Jone's Two Face.Two Face is too ridculous for anyone over 10 and too creepy for those under 10.I like the effort of moving from dark to campy but c'mon at least try to make some sense and not try and fail to make us laugh. The title really works with the plot though)
And then things got worse 2ears later when in another fiend was released......
Batman and Robin (1997)
Presentation: 0/20 (Lackluster doesn't begin to describe how the beginning of the movie went.Nor does stupid. At the beginning we see Batman summoning the now very ugly Batmobile and Robin then whine about wanting a car.After they leave the Batcave they go to the Art Museum where Mr. Freeze is stealing diamonds. Mr. Freeze has the ugliest suit known to man and he starts off his antics with a bad ice pun.While Mr. Freeze is making bad puns.Batman and Robin are fighting a stupid looking hockey team.This makes Batman Forever look kind of dark now.I thought that movie had a bad presentation now I've seen it all)
Plot: 16/20 (Believe it or not I actually liked the plot,it was the first real plot since Batman89 that wasn't going in too many directions.Basically Batman and co. are trying to find a cure for Alfred who is dying from a rare disease that only Mr. Freeze can cure but they also have to stop Mr. Freeze,Poison Ivy,and Bane from taking over Gotham City and turning it into a not-so winter wonderland with plants.That is exactly what a villain should do if they have that kind of power make a place that can enjoy. On top of that Robin is beginning to resent the attention Batman gets. But a plot like this needs good execution)
Characters: 0/20 (Except for Alfred,they are either undeveloped or stupid. Bruce Wayne has gone from being the assertive guy starting to develop a playboy edge with Val Kilmer last film to the bad comedian and the Batman side has gone from smart to dim-witted.Robin/Dick Grayson has lost any bit of humility and has amped up the bratty meter.Poison Ivy is creepy rather than convincing.Mr. Freeze only makes bad jokes. Batgirl is when we first meet her completely dull and undeveloped and we finish the film off and se her as still dull and undeveloped)
Clooney's Role: 1/20 (Ok while he did bomb at being Bruce Wayne he did slightly better at being Batman than Christian Bale in the latest outing. He really turned a once promsing character into a really preachy and/or bad comedian kind of character. Although I did like the 2 scenes in which he was with his girlfriend.Still if I were a Batman acting teacher I'd give him an F on his report card.But since I'm just a critic this all I can do)
O'Donnell's Role: 0/20 (He was only mostly irritating in Batman Forever but he had his moments,now he's completely irritating.He has made Robin a lot whinier than he used to be and he seems like he's about to betray Batman at any minute almost like villain in a way.I'm all for a little bit of animosity between sidekick and hero in fact I like that.It really can't always be a perfect relationship.But he didn't act out his side well at all)
Schwarzeneggar's Role: 0/20 (I never thought I'd be the one to say this but his potrayal of Mr. Freeze makes his work as Governor of California look good.His work as Mr. Freeze is completely embarrassing above all else with all those bad ice puns.I didn't think there were that many ice puns you could make.I liked the puns when I was 4 but now they look real bad.His suit is ugly and what he does eck!!!! He's not even remotely threatning. I was really hoping we'd never see a travesty like Tommy Lee Jones' Two Face again but alas we did)
Thurman's Role: 0/20 (She's more creepy than anything else. Her lines would be great if she could just get the correct facial expression.This kind of thing should be minor but in this case not so.The worst is when she is trying to flirt with somebody)
Silverstone's Role: 0/20 (The only way her potrayal could've possibly been worse was if she took lessons from Lauren Holly. She was about as dull as a character could get. The best line she said in the whole film was in fact "Suit me up Alfred" in the dull tone but nonetheless, it was still her best which is really sad.It's no wonder she got a Razzie Award for Worst Supporting Actress)
Set: 2/20 (It looks fake and uncovincing and since when did Gotham City have so many high bridges or a huge hand? Why they didn't keep the set from Batman Forever is beyond me.On the bright side the Batcave entrance looks almost passable)
Execution: 0/20 (While there were plenty of twists none of them were for the better,when Poison Ivy entered that big crowd and everyone started fighting for her with her love toxins,Batman pulled out a credit card that there is just wrong.How the heck could any of the villains have survived the huge they made when in Batman Forever Edward Nygma killed his boss from a lower height or when in Batman89 Joker also died from a height about that high? The lamest part was how Batgirl became Batgirl. She just infiltrated the cave and Alfred just gave her a suit.Does that mean one of Alfred's old chaps could become a hero,does that mean Alfred's other niece had an equal chance to? How Robin made up with Batman felt like a bad dose of deux es machina simply to end the movie.How they even got away from the capsule that should've turned them to ice at the beginning is really ridiculous. The one well executed part was the dress up of Batgirl in which you got close ups of the butt,crotch,and boobs. But if you're gay or a straight girl that will count negatively and besides they did the same thing for the dress up Batman and Robin which has the opposite effect and they are 2 and Batgirl is one,it cancels out.The plot would've worked well had it been Christopher Nolan in charge or Tim Burton [except with Tim Burton Alfred would've died for certain].)
Final: 2/20 (This movie could've been good if the actors had better lines and the plot was better executed. Even if Schwarzneggar was dropped that would be good.Clearly you can see the director was certain all you needed to make a good Batman movie was good actors)
Other movies these actors have been in
Michael Keaton: First Daughter (2006),Beetlejuice (1988)
Michelle Pfeiffer: Hairspray (2007)
Danny DeVito: Matilda(1995)
Christopher Walken: Hairspray (2007)
Val Kilmer: Willow (1988),Prince of Egypt (1998)
Nicole Kidman: Nothing worth her performance
Chris O'Donnell: NCIS:Los Angeles
Alicia Silverstone: Clueless
Jim Carrey: Ace Ventura (1993), Liar,Liar(1997)
Tommy Lee Jones: None that I know of
Uma Thurman: See Tommy Lee Jones
Arnold Schwarzenneggar: Terminator(1980,1992, and 2003)
I'll get to Batman89 and The Dark Knight later
No comments:
Post a Comment